Whether you’re foolishly in love, single and suicidal or living the life of a stud muffin this Valentine’s Day, why not treat yourself to a little movie magic. In i-D’s pick of sickly [and sweet] films, there’s gore, glamour and goo. Indulge on this love sick day with our red hot movie suggestions!
Text: Paris Bennett
True Romance – 1993
Tarantino can do romance. His debuting picture is the perfect combination of love, blood and hardcore violence. Clarence (Christian Slater) is a comic book geek and Alabama (Patricia Arquette) is a call girl, a present for his birthday from his boss. A fast paced love affair ensues and within the first 20 minutes of the film, they are Mr and Mrs, with endless love tattoos. But life ain’t that sweet. A good dose of gangster, brothels and violence takes our love-sick protagonists across the country in a purple cadillac, getting in too deep. With style in abundance and an imaginary friend called Elvis, True Romance hits the top spot.
My Bloody Valentine – 2009
Lust, high school, the big ‘V’ day and some graphic murders in 3D, count us in for that aphrodisiac! In the sleepy mining town of Harmony, a terrible drilling accident causes the mine to collapse, burying six miners alive. But when a rescue team only find one survivor, Harry Warden, alive, but in coma, and see that the other miners have been slain by his pickaxe, they conclude that Harry killed them to save oxygen for himself. On Valentine’s Day, Harry awakes from his coma in the local hospital, and brutally murders twenty-two people, including a group of teenagers that are partying in the mine. Harry is then killed, but oh no wait he isn’t, and so strikes revenge 10 years later to the survivors that he missed in his first sexed up killing spree.
Romeo and Juliet – 1968
Franco Zeffirelli’s take on Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet. No doubt you will know this bitter sweet tale of our favourite star crossed lovers. But for a quick recap, two families of Verona, the Montagues and the Capulets, have been feuding for donkey’s years. Massive drama when a young Romeo Montague goes out with the lads to make naughtiness at a party the Capulets are hosting, but while there, he and the Capulet’s daughter, Juliet, fall hopelessly in love in a matter of seconds. From this moment on, life is rather complicated. Best friends are killed, secret marriages take place, fake deaths and bad timings ensue. If you hate bad endings, switch off half way through and tell yourself they lived happily ever after.
Valentine – 2001
Set in 1988, at the school dance, the unfortunate looking Jeremy Melton bravely faces one rejection after another when asking four ‘it’ girls to dance with him. He hits success when he asks the chubbier, more desperate fifth member of this girlie gang. Whilst these two social outcasts are making out, a group of school bullies catch them, and the girl starts accusing him of attacking her. Poor Melton is then publically flogged at the dance and sent off to various correctional facilities, never to be seen again. As if. Flash forward to 2001, we see the same fit five, all grown up, dealing with their love dilemmas on this same romantic date. But when one has her throat slit and a handful of creepy Valentine’s cards get sent about, you know it’s about to go down. There are maggot infested chocolates, a Valentine’s porn art exhibition and the murderer wears a Cherub-mask.
Moulin Rouge! – 2001
When you think of Valentine’s Day, it is an occasion of glitz, endless possibilities, unrealistic fantasies, parading around in your undies and the colour red. To regurgitate that into movie form, voila, we give you Moulin Rouge. The brilliant creative mind of Baz Luhrmann brings this dazzling modern take on a fictional romantic tale set in the famous Parisian nightclub. It is the Bohemian revolution, drugs and prostitution galore, both the rich and poor men of the city hit the Moulin Rouge for entertainment of all sexual varieties. But soon with a case of mistaken identity, the club’s star courtesan, Satine, and a penniless writer, Christian, fall head over heels. But no, no, no, she is set to marry the filthy rich Duke, whom the Moulin Rouge rely on for his generous donations. The couple fight all odds to stay together, but how will it end? In a big musical number, probably.